100 Things

I've seen these lists here and there and thought "Why the hell not?" Usually, that thought gets me into lots of trouble, but I think I'm safe here. Let's kick this off...

1. My birthday is on Columbus Day.
2. No, it's not always on a Monday. (You wouldn't believe how many times I've been asked that.)
3. I hate being asked stupid questions.
4. I'm very sarcastic. It's a family trait.
5. I sometimes hurt feelings with my sarcasm. I feel badly about that.
6. I don't get offended when people tell me that I'm being a bitch.
7. I'm totally a bitch.
8. I'm obsessed with time. (Watches, clocks, hourglasses. And I must always know what time it is.)
9. I'm also obsessed with containers. (If allowed, I would go all obsessive compulsively Martha Stewart on the house and would put everything in containers and label each container.)
10. I'm not allowed to go all obsessive compulsively Martha Stewart on the house, so I tend to over compensate and can be a bit of a slob at times.
11. I have really great eyebrows. (I get lots of compliments on them.)
12. I've been tweezing and/or waxing my brows since I was 13. (I won't allow anyone else to do them.)
13. I love cooking.
14. I'm a really great cook.
15. I hate to clean.
16. But once I start to clean, I find it hard to stop.
17. I have to write on yellow notepads.
18. I love music and play it almost constantly.
19. I have a constant stream of music running through my brain.
20. I've been known to break out into song and dance numbers.
21. I've startled people with my song and dance numbers.
22. I can't sing for shit, but that doesn't stop me.
23. I can dance pretty well.
    
24. I've been told that my lips look too perfect to be real.
25. My lips are real.
26. My favorite thing to drink is tea.
27. I'm very picky about my tea.
28. I'm very picky.
29. I draw some very weird and scary people sometimes.
30. I'm afraid of marriage.
31. I'm also afraid of clowns.
32. I got married once.
    
33. Not to a clown. (But I guess that's a matter of opinion, really.)
    
34. I got divorced after a 3 year separation.
35. I was always more afraid of shadows than complete darkness.
36. Someone once gave me a porcelain clown nightlight which I was forced to use.
    
37. I've been an insomniac for a very long time.
38. I'm a tomboy.
39. I'm also very girly.
40. My IQ is estimated to be around 154.
41. I took the test at around 3 AM, so I'm not entirely sure that it's accurate.
42. I'm a good test taker.
43. I went to a small, private, women's college for about a year and a half.
44. I was asked nicely to leave at the end of that year and a half.
45. I've always had more male friends than female friends.
46. I am, at turns, incredibly arrogant and self-conscious.
47. When I was little, I spoke several languages fluently.
    
48. I have since forgotten most of those languages.
49. I would rather read the book than watch the movie. (In most cases.)
50. I love going to museums. (Though I rarely ever get to go to one.)
51. I love veggies.
52. I haven't eaten red meat in 13 years.
53. I almost went completely veg, but worried about getting lazy and not eating properly and didn't.
54. I prefer home-cooked meals to fast food.
55. I have a serious sweet tooth.
56. I'm addicted to buying shoes.
57. And makeup.
58. And cds.
59. I'm probably the only woman in the world who would be thrilled to receive an appliance for a gift.
60. I heart Kitchenaid.
61. I have a list of crushes a mile long. It's become a running joke.
62. I like funny guys.
63. I love funny guys bearing gifts.
64. I hate getting cut flowers as a gift.
65. Yes, I would rather have a live plant.
66. I'm really picky about my chocolate.
67. Other than those things, I'm really easy to shop for.
68. I'm addicted to Macys.
69. I love to talk about myself.
70. I love to talk about my kids.
71. I love my family. (Even when I don't.)
72. My family pisses me off a lot.
73. I'm the black sheep of the family.
74. I'm also probably the palest person in my family.
75. Or the world.
76. But I have no wrinkles!
77. I once had a pet goat.
78. My grandfather served him for dinner.
79. I really, really, really hate bananas.
80. I've never been stung by a bee.
81. I'm afraid of bees.
82. I have never had a cavity. (With my sweet tooth, this is indeed a miracle.)
83. I have naturally curly hair.
    
84. I don't use shampoo. (No, my hair doesn't stink.)
85. I color my hair because I'm mostly gray.
86. Premature gray runs in my family.
87. My natural color is almost black.
88. I now color it a medium brown.
89. My favorite season is fall.
90. I hate wearing dresses.
91. I don't like to dress up.
92. But if I have to, I will look damn good.
93. I've been known to scream at inanimate objects.
94. I have a bad temper.
95. I tend to be the mediator in my family.
96. I always have to have lip balm near me.
97. I always have to have something to drink near me.
98. I love spoiling people.
99. I love being spoiled.
100. I'm an only child.

Whew.. That was harder than I expected.